You CAN teach an old dog new tricks!

I am so proud of myself!
I figured out the glitch and FIXED the time date stamp!
This may not seem like a big deal to some of you, but to ME, it is in fact monumental!
Yay, me!
Okay. Goodnight already!

I hate technology!

WHY is the time and date stamp incorrect on my posts????
I posted my birthday musings at a little after 1am on Sept. 27.
The time date stamp says 10:55 p.m. on Sept. 26th!
this is so FRUSTRATING!!!
Grrrrrrrrrrrr.....I am too old to figure this stuff out, HA!
I am going to bed now. :(

Happy Birthday to ME!

Okay, here I sit at nearly one a.m. on September 27th, 2009....my (gulp) fortieth birthday.

Just TYPING that word nearly made me cry!
FORTY years? You have to be kidding me. HOW can I be forty years old? I feel like I am just a kid. I don't feel like I know anything! Surely my whole life is still ahead of me, an unwritten page....

Wow. I am moving into middle age. I just can't believe it!

I have never been one to balk at birthdays. Never! In fact, the whole family jokes about how I have always done the countdown until "my" date arrives on the calendar...you know the type---when the clock on the microwave reads 9:27, I announce to everyone that my birthdate is on the clock. I then conveniently add "Let me take this opportunity to remind you that you have only 55 shopping days remaining until my next birthday!"

NOT this year. For some reason, I have faced this dawning of my new decade with a feeling of ambivalence, sometimes disbelief, and at times even panic! Seriously.

I feel I have finally pinpointed a bit of the reason for my dread of this new age I am forced to become: I don't feel like I have done or become all that I should have by the age of forty! I feel like I have dropped the ball somewhere, or I haven't finished my assignment on time...something!

I am realizing, through this mild "mid-life crisis" of sorts, that it doesn't matter. Who I am today, and what I have become, and what is left undone is NO surprise to Him who made me and guarded over my birth, forty years ago today (which was a miracle in itself in 1969, at 3 months premature---but that's another post!). He sees my heart, He wrote my days before I breathed my first breath, He sees the end from the beginning.....He knows me. HE knows ME! He KNOWS me.

For that, I am thankful. For everything I am not yet, HE IS. His Grace is more than enough to take me there.
I think I will sit my forty-year-old bones down and REST in that a spell! ;)

(Thanks, too, to my many dear friends for all the birthday wishes!! I am so grateful that I have met each of you on my journey!).

Anyone impressed???

Okay, so I have been very remiss in updating my blog....I guess 'remiss' isn't even close! I had not put anything up here since the end of APRIL for crying out loud, YIKES! It's four months later, and I pledge to do better......stay tuned to the Busy Mama Bee blog for more updates!
I have a lot of things to say! :)

Brotherly Love

This morning as I nursed the baby, Rachael was standing close to my chair, still in her pajamas, looking adorable (as usual!). She was also wanting to nurse, so I was making attempts to distract her (she turned 3 three weeks ago, and was supposed to wean, but that is another blog post! For memory's sake, go back to my 2007 posts and re-read about Jason's weaning, sigh!).

Matthew was sitting in the rocking chair across the room. I whispered, "Rachael, go over there and give Matthew a big hug!". She immediately wrinkled up her face as if she had just bitten a sour pickle and said, "What for?"

Trying not to laugh, I said, "Because he's your brother and you love him!" and she covered her little mouth with her hand and said, "Oh yeah, I forgot that!"
:)

Twinly IQ Test

This morning at the homeschool table, Patrick asks me in a conspiratorial tone, "Mom, you don't have to tell us, but do you know in your brain which one of us is smarter???!".
How could I not laugh out loud?? :)

Stay tuned!!!

....for all those wonderful, supportive, amazing friends of mine who have walked with me through my birthing journey----YES I am still going to write out my birth story! No, you haven't missed it, I just haven't found the time to WRITE it yet! sigh....

I think now is the time.
I am inspired to write it, having just returned home from an amazing 3 day trip to the ICAN conference in Atlanta!! I was privileged to MEET many of the beautiful, precious women who have helped me the past two years in my journey towards birthing the way God designed me to birth.

LOOK for the birth story, coming soon to a blog near you! :)
(and meanwhile, here is a sweet picture of my inspiration, the birth-ee if you will, HA!).